A Saiyan Tail
Part Two: A Tail of Two Saiyans
By: Chocolate-chan
Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, boring psychological angst blahblahblah...

“Do you want my help?”
His lips parted, but no sound emerged.
“Kotae wa,” Trunks insisted.
//Answer you? How?//
“H-hai.”
“Then, if you’re willing to know, before the end of the summer I think there are good odds that your decision will come to you.” Trunks carried him, taking off from the tree. Goten could do nothing but relax, feeling a sensation of warmth, a scent that he wanted to drown in.
He woke some time later, and Trunks was standing over him.
“We’ve worked out an arrangement.”
“We?”
“With our parents.”
“And that is?”
“You’re spending the summer with me.”
“At Capsule Corp.?”
“No. There’s an abandoned cabin I know about. The owner didn’t want it, and neither did anyone else. I think it would be good that we spent some time together anyway, don’t you? It’s been a while.” //I know it’s different now, but I will pretend that nothing is wrong.//
“Umm... are you sure you know what you’re doing?” Goten’s face reflected uncertainty.
“Listen up. Just go there with me. If you want to leave at any time, do so, no questions asked. If you decided to stay the rest of the summer... then we’ll see how things are then. What do you say?”
//I’d say, how can you be so damn stoic. I’d say, I’m so damn confused I don’t know what to say.// “Alright. I did agree to accept your help, after all. But I’m still not sure why you’re helping me.”
Trunks had turned away to pick up a pair of bags at his feet, but he paused and returned his gaze to Goten’s dark eyes. “You’re Goten. I’m Trunks. That’s just the way it is.”
“What, like, fate and junk?” Goten shook his head. //Interesting way to put it. What did he mean, I wonder?// “You’re losing it man, but that’s not what I meant. I mean, what are you helping me to do? I don’t understand why I need help.” Goten stood to face him.
“Well, if we get to the point where you’re not asking that question, I’m going to sign up and become a psychiatrist.” He winked and tossed Goten a bag while vaulting up into the air. “Follow me!”
“You act like you’re already some damn psycho-trist!” Goten shouted, snatching his bag from midair and glaring at Trunks’ retreating form. “Matte!” He launched upward.

“Well, it’s in good condition for having been abandoned so long.”
Goten silently agreed, but there were things around the place that would need to be done. It was small, but it didn’t seem too small. Trunks dropped his bag outside the door and so did Goten, and Trunks turned and said, “Things need to be done outside, and cleaning inside.”
“I don’t wanna clean.”
“Neither do I.” He shuddered. “Ever had that experience with Pan?” At Goten’s flat, disinterested expression, Trunks sighed. “Jan-ken-pon, best two out of three.”
“Hai.”
Winner: Goten with paper.
Winner: Trunks with rock.
Winner: Trunks with scissors.
“Fine,” Goten said, and turned toward the house.
“Nani Kashira?”
“Hmm?” Goten paused and turned to face Trunks.
“Where’s the protesting? Where’s the ‘Trunks you dirty cheater?’” Trunks gave him a purposely infuriating face.
“Unless you really want to clean the damn house, leave me the hell alone.” Annoyance sparked in Goten’s expression as he turned.
//Is he always like that now? Or is he still sensitive to me, maybe. Well, day one: feeling out boundaries.// Trunks took a deep sustaining breath as Goten reached for the door, and it nearly fell off on his foot. Goten let the door drop to the ground, pointed at it and said, “You can do that.” before entering the small cabin.
Trunks rolled his eyes and smirked. He looked around, seeing a small shed out near the side of the house. //Bingo!// He entered it and found all sorts of things that would help them through their time there. He pulled pieces from the scrap metal pile along with hammer and some nails. He was soon at the front of the house, levitating a foot or two from the ground, pounding away. //If I just pretend it’s a Capsule Corp. ship, there will be no problem. Itai, except if I pound myself in the thumb with the hammer again.//
He listened, since his task didn’t require overmuch thought, as Goten coughed several times inside, and opened the windows whether they wanted to be opened or not. He apparently had found a broom; it swished over the floor and out to where Trunks was working, pushing up respectable dust clouds. Goten glanced up at where Trunks was fixing hinges, and Trunks smiled at him. Goten turned, straight-faced and silent back to his work.
//Well, if you’re feeling hostile toward me, Goten-chan, then why did you agree to come? I don’t recall dazzling you with my “Charms.”// He grinned to himself, noting that there was much room for self-amusement, especially since he was hopeful. He knew Goten.
Then, all of a sudden, Goten powered up inside the house. Trunks paused, then leaned around the doorframe and peeked in. “Goten-kun, daijoubu desu ka?”
“Mm.” Goten’s ki lit up the cabin as he joined his fists together in a club form. Trunks cringed when he saw that Goten was dealing with a rusty pump.
“Don’t break it. Ehm... Go-”
He was being ignored. Goten knocked the pump handle downward, and from underneath up again. He reached forward and pumped a slightly unsteady stream of water. He powered down. “‘S old.” Then he turned away and rummaged through the bottom of the cabinet.
Trunks shook his head and finished the door, then oiled its makeshift hinges and swung it open and closed. “Looks alright.” //Let’s just hope I did it right.//
He settled on the ground and paused then entered the house. He knelt down and oiled the inside pump, working it up and down a couple of times. Goten turned and nodded his thanks. He appeared to be finding some type of soap that would clean some of the scattered furniture, floor, and windows.
Trunks investigated the rest of the house, deciding that everything was okay until it decided to break for good. “Goten,” he said, sticking his head in the door. “I’m going to hunt some dinner, kay?”
“Fine.” Goten didn’t turn from where he was washing a window. “Don’t get lost.”
“I’m pleased you care,” Trunks said and disappeared before a comment could be cast at him.
“Well,” Goten muttered to the surrounding silence. “I wouldn’t want to have to do the cooking. I don’t want to see my food look at me from a plate before I cook and eat it. Kuso, he probably will make me cook. I get the worst jobs.”
Goten brought the bags into the house after he had finished all his cleaning and laid them on a small table. “Two chairs, two cots, perfect. I suppose it will be at least survivable here.”
“Geez Goten, send all these mixed messages. Do you want to be here or not?” Trunks teased as he came into the room with an already-cut batch of meat.
“Does it matter?”
“Of course. How you feel matters to me. But you can back out anytime you want; just leave.” Trunks then sweetly asked him to start a fire.
//Back out,// Goten thought, offended as he bent at the hearth and complied with the request. //You won’t bait me like that, Bakayaro.//
The fire was lit in no time and Trunks wordlessly began to cook the meat. Goten paused in the middle of the room, hands on hips, able to tell that Trunks didn’t feel as flippant and upbeat as he seemed. He would almost say that the older young man was upset as he was. Trunks said suddenly, “By the way, I did indeed get the stuff in your bag from your room, so you know.”
“Hadn’t looked.” Goten decided to do so now. He sat on the cot he decided to claim and fished through his bag. There seemed to be everything he needed, plus one. “What’s this?”
“Well... it was already in that bag, and I haven’t seen you go anywhere on trips without it, so I left it alone.” It was Goten’s favorite manga. He was tempted to throw it into the fire just to spite Trunks, but decided that a temper tantrum was not worth the effort. //Fine.//
Goten looked in some of the small cabinets near the pump, deciding that that was officially the kitchen. He found some plates and things, and had to wash them before they were sanitary.
“There’s a river nearby, for when you want a bath,” Trunks said. “It’s that way.” He pointed toward one corner of the cabin. “Order’s up,” he said and flipped a few pieces of meat into the air. Goten cursed and scrambled to catch them.
“Baka!”
“Please, Goten,” Trunks said, sounding almost condescending. “You’re here; there’s no chance dinner would end up on the floor, I know you better than that. Besides, you’re related to your father aren’t you?” Trunks seemed amused and gave him some type of stick kabob thingy with weird wild vegetables roasted on it. “We’re really going to have to learn the fine art of fire-side cooking.” He prepared his plate and scooted his chair over to the table.
They ate in silence, quickly. Goten paused about halfway through the meal and looked out the darkening window, sighing. Trunks glanced up at him but was silent.
After dinner, Goten once again washed dishes and put them away. Then he grabbed a blanket from his cot and sat down by the fire, with it wrapped around him. Trunks turned his chair closer to the fire and said, “So how do you feel today, Goten?”
“I’m cold.” The temperature had indeed dropped.
“Okay. Any emotional insights to share?”
“No.” Goten stared into the blue licks of flame at the bottom of the hearth.
“Alright then, I’ll tell you something. Something from today, you think? Or some other day you’d like to know about?”
//No, Trunks, I’m not about to come right to the point.// “I don’t care.”
“Alright.” Trunks leaned back in his chair and looked at the ceiling, apparently giving it real thought. “Well, I am glad you’re here with me now.”
“Are you.”
“Yes. I don’t like seeing you like you’re acting.” His voice was solemn.
“Who’s acting?”
“Yes. That too, I suppose.” Trunks paused. “I know we didn’t do this kind of thing very often when we were little. I always thought it would be fun to do, but we just never got around to it.”
“You think this is fun?”
“Iie, Goten-chan, you’re doing your best to keep it from being fun.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“How do you prefer I’d address you?”
“You have to address me?”
“Well if you’re more comfortable hearing “Hey you,” all the time... well, how about just Goten?”
“How about not.”
“I always used to call you just ‘Goten’.... wakatta. As you like. I just never imagined I’d see such an antisocial Son Goten, much less in such an unusual setting.” Since Goten didn’t really have anything he cared to say on that point, Trunks said, “Your turn.”
“I don’t have anything to say.”
“Then answer a question for me.”
“Alright.”
“Are you angry at me?” The tone was light, and Goten didn’t look up at him to see his expression.
He grabbed the edge of the blanket and pulled it up, and was silent for a long time. “I don’t know,” he said at last.
“Sou ka.” Trunks was silent for another moment. “Do you have a reason, good or bad, for which you should be mad at me? If so, I’d like to hear it.”
“You said ‘a question.’”
The flames crackled and popped. “Oyasumi nasai, Goten-ch... iie, Goten-san.” Trunks rose and placed a hand lightly on the tousled dark head, earning a glare. Trunks made no response to it, instead passing him by heading for his cot. Goten turned back to the fire, and let his chin rest on his updrawn knees.
Goten thought back on the time they’d been together. Almost as if they had surrendered to each other. Then he experienced the hurt all over again from when he woke alone. //What are you trying to prove... Trunks, what’s in your head?//

“You shouldn’t sleep like that, Goten-chan...”
“Don’t call me that.” Goten raised his head, feeling his aching neck protest as he turned it and stretched slowly. “Ahh...”
“Here,” Trunks said, reaching forward and rubbing the back of his neck slightly. Goten gasped inaudibly, feeling a cold shock go through him, like a shock that was no heat or energy, only awareness.
“I can’t help you if you don’t relax.”
“Who asked for help?”
“Wakarimashita.” Trunks sounded amused, and Goten wasn’t quite sure what Trunks thought he’d figured out. “Fine. It’s _your_ neck. But maybe you should lay down for a while after sitting by the hearth all night. I’m going to get us a meal. Oh, Goten? Is it okay to do two meals a day or do you want three? I thought, since you know how creative you and I are, we could train. We could never think of anything else to do between us.”
Goten considered for a long moment as he stood and stretched, standing above Trunks. “Fine.” He dropped his blanket on the bed, saying, “A little after breakfast. Two meals is fine.”
Trunks nodded his agreement, then paused. “This is good. I haven’t had a _real_ workout in a while, play-fighting aside. This might even be fun, to use the old powers and all. You know you’re the only one who’s a challenge for me, Goten-ch...” He trailed off and scratched the back of his neck. “Okay, you feeling like bear or baby deer this morning?”
“Surprise me,” Goten said dryly.
Trunks grinned, and Goten wondered for a moment what kind of ‘challenge’ he’d been talking about. After he left, Goten rubbed his eyes, only discovering oily skin from sitting and sweating by the fire all night.
//Bathtime.//

Goten wondered if they could do laundry here as well. It was a fast-flowing river. //Laundry. I don’t think I’ve ever had to think so practically. Ka-san always...// Goten sighed, not feeling the need to voice the thought. He blinked, and the morning seemed dimmer, the kind where the sun is too hot and the grass is too wet. He rubbed the towel over his head and did his best to ignore it.
Goten sat down on a rock and looked around. He caught a flash of purple through the trees, and saw Trunks approach the river. He was dragging a small carcass. Goten didn’t look at it too closely, but watched as Trunks quickly cut it up with a large skinning knife. //I didn’t know he could even be trusted with cutlery.// Then he bent over to wash blood from his body and clothes.
Goten tired of watching him and walked back to the house, sighing. //I won’t feel like fighting on a full stomach.// He caught a whiff of something on the breeze and raised his head. //Blossoms?//
He glanced around for the source. His eyes strayed over the house, and that was where they returned as it clicked. He hadn’t really noticed it before, but a large tree grew over the house, and it had fading blooms that fell to the ground. Goten launched himself upward in a jump and landed on the roof.
“Goten-kun....” Trunks called ahead as he came home. Goten sat on the edge of the roof and waited for him to notice. “What’d you do, leave?” Trunks paused outside the door.
Goten couldn’t help but smile to himself a little as he dropped an apple onto Trunks’ head. Trunks looked first down at it, then blinked several times and looked up at Goten. He smiled a bit at first, then when he saw Goten’s expression he smiled even more.
Goten let it fall away. “Demo... I’m not really hungry now.”
Trunks made a face. “I am. But I guess it can wait.”

“Come on Goten, you’re really off!”
Goten made a face and kicked Trunks in the ankle just to be spiteful. They traded punches fiercely, with Trunks pressing forward. It felt like somehow he had an extreme advantage in this battle, but Goten once again couldn’t figure out why.
Just like every other day this past week and a half.
Trunks was having fun, obviously so, but he seemed disappointed, even frustrated that Goten wasn’t at his best.
“You say that every day! Maybe I just don’t have it anymore.” Goten railed in retaliation from competition and anger.
“Don’t have it?” Trunks stopped so abruptly that he got a hammer punch upside the head. “Goten, I don’t think you can _lose_ it.” He blinked some sparkle effects out of his vision and stood with his hands on his hips, saying, “I think your problem is translating itself. Why is it that you can’t fight me? Why can’t you concentrate your whole being on the battle with me? I’m almost insulted.”
“We’re not Saiyans,” Goten retorted. “Death Challenges do not exist in polite society. I know you’re Vegeta’s son, but get a grip!”
“Why are you dissing half of your heritage? Chill, I don’t see why you can’t be Chichi’s son and Goku’s son and just let it all flow. Anyway, don’t change the subject.” Trunks gave him a warning expression.
Goten made a derisive sound. “Sorry Doctor Briefs.”
“Sounds good...” Trunks thought about that for a minute. “Yeah right. First, you need to get rid of a lot of your anger toward me. That would help. Hey, I know the perfect way to do it!” Trunks smiled happily.
“I’m tired of sparring for today.”
“Oh... well, if you could channel it into your workout, we could have at least a few minutes to talk before it returned full force. Man, anyone would think _you’re_ Vegeta’s kid.”
“Shut up! You say the stupidest things! And I like my ‘anger toward you’ right where it is; toward you! Quit trying to mess with my head.” Goten raised a fist in his direction.
“Or what?” Trunks asked, crossing his arms and letting his voice drip with sarcasm. “You’ll ‘get serious’?”
“Chikushoume!” Goten found himself in a headlock on the ground as he moved to punch. He lay still for a moment and Trunks rose off of him.
“You’re too easy, Goten. And I’ll admit to being a son of a bachelor, but quit insulting my mom.”
Goten glowered.
“If you had been yourself, you would have seen through the little princeling act.”
“‘Princeling’?”
“Learned it from Tou-san. Tonikaku, this is about you. How do you feel?”
“What?” Goten glared at the seeming non sequitor.
“Tell me what you feel right now.”
“I’m pissed off at you!”
“That’s good then.”
Goten snorted.
“Why are you pissed at me?”
“Because!” Trunks waited and Goten growled and turned to leave. He was stopped by a vise-like grip on his arm. “Get off me.”
“If you don’t like the way I do things, then you can leave. But that means you’ve wasted nearly a week and a half, and anyway, that won’t be right now.” Trunks jerked roughly on his arm and threw him right down onto his butt. “Kotae wa.”
“I don’t know. It... it always seems like you’re making fun of me. Picking at me.” Goten looked flustered. His tail twitched violently as he recalled some of Trunks’ more disdainful expressions.
“Mm. Making fun of you?” Trunks knelt across from him.
“Especially here. It’s like, you act like you think less of me because I can’t match you anymore.”
“I don’t think less of you. I’m disappointed in you. You know better than anyone that you can match me. You just won’t.” Trunks waited for a response from a seemingly deflated Goten, who rubbed the back of his neck.
“I’ve tried. Especially since you started making me mad.”
Trunks reached over and brushed the hair back from his forehead. Before Goten could slap his hand away, he gave the dark-haired boy a tap on the forehead with one finger. “I know you. I can sense you. I know what emotions you experience, and usually I can figure out why. You simply cannot concentrate on me. You don’t want to. You don’t want to think about me at all. That’s why we’re here. You have to think about me.”
“Why should I?”
“That’ll be a good question to ask yourself while you go get us some dinner. I’m going to take a bath.” Trunks rose and walked away. “Good workout today, Goten. Eh... -san.” He didn’t look back.
After a long while of simply staring at the spot where the trees had obscured his figure, Goten simply screamed in frustration. “I hate you Trunks! I _will_ kick your ass!” //Hope he heard me, too.//
Goten didn’t have far to go to find a kill. Trunks liked deer, so Goten killed a couple of beavers instead.
“Kuso yo, Trunks... why do you always have to act like you know what you’re doing? If you brought me all the way out here to make me hate you IT’S WORKING!!!” He shouted this last through the forest hoping Trunks sneezed his head right off his shoulders.
Goten was cooking in front of the fireplace when Trunks slid into the room drying his hair. It had needed a cut when they left. Goten thunked his dinner on the table wordlessly and saw Trunks’ reaction. //You know I hate beaver.//
Goten put his own onto the table and prepared to sit down, but paused.
Trunks didn’t say anything. Something about that irked him just right. “Well?!”
“Thanks for dinner, Goten-cha... uh... you.”
Goten crossed his arms and nodded to himself. “Yoshi.” He turned and walked out the door with no further dialog.
“You want your beaver?”
Goten flew off without answering. He could almost hear Trunks thinking, //Did I push him over the edge?// Instead Goten pressed his ki level way down and made a loop, landing on the roof. He grabbed an apple and ate it slowly. It was better than all that meat. It had too many wild flavors. Trunks didn’t seem to mind it though.
//Oh, don’t think about Trunks,// Goten told himself. At the thought of his name even, he started to get pissed, and his ki level was harder to surpress. //Think about giving Trunks what he deserves. Yeah, happy thoughts.//
In his mind, he was in a competition with Trunks. Just when everything was looking good for the purple-haired demi-Saiyan, Goten had a smashing from-behind victory.
//What would it have been like before?// he wondered idly, resting his head on his arms. //Well, he would have congratulated me. I would have smiled. Geez, I did that a lot.// He could even see that. He told Trunks, “You put up a good fight. You’ve gotten much better, but so have I.”
“Well, now I have all the more reason to train, to get you back.” Trunks would smile back at him. And there was the familiar equalization of instinct, only this time Goten was feeling so out-of-whack that even the simulation in his head didn’t feel right. The equalization occurred when the two young men looked at each other for a long moment, re-affirming in their own minds that the other person was a friend, not someone to be attacked or competed with. It was a little harder, being half Saiyan, to pull back from that edge.
“Come on Goten, I’m hungry. Let’s go home.” Trunks threw an arm around his shoulders and looked at him as they walked away.
And Goten could now see it, looking at Trunks in his mind’s eye. //I still...// He grew angry, so angry he didn’t know what to do with it, didn’t try to control it.
“There you are, Goten, aren’t you hungry?” Trunks landed on the roof a few feet away. He approached and kneeled by him with a questioning look.
“If I was hungry, don’t you think I would eat, you idiot?” Goten growled, not wanting to speak to him.
“Knock it off, Goten, you’re behaving like a little brat.” Trunks’ eyebrows slanted, and he gained a frighteningly Vegeta-similar expression as his tail made a violent slashing movement.
Goten didn’t even feel any kind of emotion connected to his movements as he reached out and hit Trunks across the face with a closed fist, knocking him backward with a dizzying abruptness.
Trunks looked up as Goten rose to his feet, totally shocked. Neither of them had ever been violent with each other, never hit each other out of competition. Trunks wasn’t hurt... well, he wasn’t injured. He rose to his feet after a moment and stood across from Goten, simply looking at him.
Though Goten didn’t let on, he was struck by the horror. Some part of him cringed and nearly died of guilt.
Trunks’ face was completely motionless, but it was like a cloud passed before the sun. He let on absolutely no emotion, but Goten knew... he wasn’t sure how, but he _knew_ exactly what Trunks was feeling. When he tapped into that sense, he cringed.
Betrayal. Then anger. That faded and was replaced by realization. //Of what?// Goten wasn’t sure he wanted to know. Then Trunks only felt an overwhelming sadness.
“Well, if that’s how you really feel,” he said mildly, and turned to jump down from the roof.
“Trunks!”
Trunks was stunned into silence, and then knocked onto the roof for a second time. Goten clutched him tightly, crying, not caring what he thought. He sobbed, seeking only forgiveness, but hoping for some type of comfort. He felt as if he had no control as to how he reacted emotionally.
Goten squeezed his eyes shut tightly, then felt hands on him. Trunks hugged him tightly, wordlessly.
//I don’t know how I feel anymore...//
Goten knew for certain that he heard an answer.
//I understand.//
Goten took a deep gasping breath, trying to tear himself away from Trunks’ embrace. //No! I don’t want to be near you! How could you just leave me like that? You bastard..!//
“Sou ka,” Trunks said quietly. “Then I can’t be right here now, with you, can I. I don’t have that right.”
Goten flung himself away from Trunks, still seething with anger and sorrow. He continued to cry.
“I understand, Goten. There’s this.. and Paris, and all these Saiyan feelings and instincts that rise to the surface. I can see it now; the piece of the puzzle that we’re both missing.”
Goten opened his eyes but didn’t look over at Trunks.
“You’re Goku’s son. That means you’re Saiyan. You’re also Chichi’s son, which means you’re human. You have to have one with the other. It’s a package deal for you and me. You can’t just decide one day that you’re going to be human, Goten! It’s not natural! And that’s exactly what you did.”
“You... you call us... n-natural?” Goten began trying to wipe away some of the still sluggishly flowing tears.
“Obviously somewhere we were.”
“Not Saiyans, us!”
“That’s it? Is it the fact that you’re part Saiyan that you can’t accept, or is it the fact that you’ll never be human? You’ll never be what you feel is normal? You can’t accept these Saiyan instincts that are beginning to make their presence known in you. You can’t live as a half-human, can you. Can you Goten?”
“I don’t know. I don’t understand what that has to do with anything!” Goten’s tail corkscrewed in distress.
“It would explain why you’re crying right now. You can’t control it. You don’t know how, you don’t want to know how. You just wish it would go away.”
“That’s right, I do.”
“To you, I’m another symbol of what you are, is that it?” There was no response, but somehow he got the feeling that that was a negative. “So... you have all these pressures building on you, which to be honest are not really things a Saiyan would know how to deal with... believe me, my dad told me about this. Waaaay simpler for Saiyans. So now your system is so out-of-balance you don’t know what to do.”
For some reason, Trunks’ words seemed to echo Goten’s feelings. “I... I... yeah, I think so.”
“And it never occurred to you to ask for help?”
“From you?” Goten asked bitterly.
“No, not from me.” Trunks’ tail drooped as did his head. Goten was a little surprised by his tone.
“Why?”
“What’s up with you, Goten? You think _ I _ know what I’m doing? Get real. I’m just trying to reconcile my instincts, those things that I want to do, with things that I shouldn’t do, or should have limits on. Although, I’ll tell you, I totally failed the test when it came to you, and I’m sorry about that.” Goten glanced over and examined his straightforward expression.
“I should have waited. I knew time wouldn’t change my feelings, but I felt as if I would die if I waited any longer. I should have known that you wouldn’t be prepared.”
Goten swallowed hard. “Are you saying that what we did wasn’t just some instinctive....... y’know........?”
“Not for me,” Trunks admitted softly. “What I’m saying is that when I told you I loved you, I wasn’t lying. I don’t really understand how I can be so firmly grounded in reality that I can be myself when you’re hanging at the end of the rope. I don’t know how I could let you.”
“Um...”
“Goten,” Trunks said with a soft sigh. “We’re here for you. Before you can decide where you want to go from here... be it with me... or back to Paris-san, or even alone for a while, you first need to know for yourself that you’re not going to lose control. You’re not going to become an entirely different person for embracing who you are. ...Look at me! Am I pretending to be some sort of expert?” Trunks laughed at himself and sighed once more.
“Don’t stop now...” Goten looked at him now, damp lashes partly hiding his eyes. “It was just starting to make sense. Well, not really.” Trunks smiled at him.
“Go to bed, Goten. You definitely need some rest, my friend... and I definitely wouldn’t mind some either.”
“Trunks, I’m sorry... I’m sorry I hurt you.” He reached over and touched Trunks’ cheek gently, looking into his eyes, truly apologetic.
//Hey, what do you know. He’s looking at me now. He’s actually acting like he cares...//
Trunks held in his surprise and pleasure, saying, “It’s okay.” He cleared his throat slightly. “Tell you what, tomorrow we’ll begin today all over again.”
Goten dropped his eyes, seeming to cloud over once again. “I don’t know. I’m really confused. Trunks... tell me now, why did you leave then? Really.”
“I guess you’re not the only one who’s afraid, Goten...” Trunks whispered, then headed back down into the house before Goten could say anything else.

Goten couldn’t help himself. He’d betrayed his intentions by letting himself get so close to Trunks again, and so the next morning saw Trunks greeting Goten with a smile and having a terse nod returned. He was a little frustrated with both of them for letting it happen.
//That’s just it, isn’t it? I came here fully intending to stay apart from him. I had already made my decision... so I thought. I was intrigued when he said he could help me because I didn’t know what he meant, but now I don’t want to be part of this.// Goten sat on his bed in the early morning with his chin on his fist. If he turned his head, he would see Trunks still sleeping, too-long hair being repeatedly blown out of his eyes and falling back down, tail swishing slightly with dream movement.
//Before... what was it that I felt? It was totally something else; I was confused. It never even occurred to me, though, to resist or try to prevent anything between us until after he left. Does he have any idea how much that hurt me?// Goten still felt raw. After that evening almost a week ago, he had drawn back into himself, because frankly he’d succumbed to shock. That night, when he had hit Trunks, there was some part of him that knew it was wrong, no matter how angry he got.
And then, there was some part of him that withered at the thought of ever doing anything to hurt him. Something that was never held up to thought or reason, something beyond his control that simply would not allow him; what had stopped him. And it was that part of him that seemed to share a connection with Trunks...
//I hate you, Trunks. Why do have to make everything so bleepin’ difficult for me?// He cast a glare over at the other cot, and in response Trunks shifted, frowning until Goten stopped dwelling on the thought. Instead he simply watched for a moment, and found that he couldn’t really maintain a good anger. //I don’t surprise me.//
Trunks even looked sweet when he was fast asleep. Goten thought of him the way he used to be. That was a long time ago, before Goten had been old enough to appreciate the simplicity. Goten rose and walked over to him, long limber form casting only a soft shadow across his face in the dim light.
//Trunks...// Goten reached a hand down and brushed soft unruly locks from his face, trailing fingertips across his cheek. //I hope you know how much I... hate... you.//
Goten drew his hand back slowly, seeming to draw back into himself as well. //You’re the only one who even had the narrowest chance to get to me, especially now in this state.//
Goten turned away. //State? I’m starting to sound like him. There’s nothing wrong with me! I’m just angry at him... I won’t forgive him! And all this preaching about ‘accepting my Saiyan side’... doesn’t he have enough dealing with his without bothering mine?// Goten moved across the room and drew a bowl of water from the kitchen pump, sitting and washing his face slowly. //Or can it be that Trunks’ heritage is a nonissue? He doesn’t even have to deal with being an alien; he doesn’t care. Well, it’s different for him!// Goten knew he was frowning from the reflection in the water, as he had stopped to stare at himself. //He’s perfect; he’s always had everything. If there’s one reason not to like Trunks, then there are always fifty more to like him for instead. No wonder; he isn’t normal anyway! Has he ever had to deal with being less than perfect like the rest of us?// Goten shivered violently, aware of how defensive he sounded to himself. He scrubbed at his face hard with the cloth, and when he paused to look at himself again he was sure it was the rubbing that had made it so red...
He squeezed out the cloth again and held it over his face. //I don’t know... I don’t know anything. I don’t know why I’m here... or why I can’t be angry with him anymore. I don’t know why I don’t feel right; I want to know why things don’t feel the same. I still feel like something in me is missing.//
“Wow, your face is going to be so clean it’s scary. And you’re thinking loud enough to wake the dead.”
Goten turned his head after a moment, seeing Trunks standing, framed by the dim morning light from behind, shirtless and wearing gi pants with his arms folded, one hand on the other elbow, hips cocked as he examined the younger demi-Saiyan.
“You can hear my thoughts?”
“No, not right now. I’m too sleepy. And you’re too emotional.” He blew his bangs from his eyes. They fell back down. “You’re very angry. Having warm thoughts of me again?” His tail flicked to accompany his irony.
“What about the rest of the time?”
“I don’t know... I suppose I could hear your thoughts if I concentrated. Why?”
Goten gave him an odd look involving at least one raised eyebrow. “‘Why?’ I should think even you realize that thoughts are someone’s very personal possession.”
“Please,” Trunks said, waving one hand as he moved through the room. He was different this time of morning; he didn’t hold himself so rigidly, he more resembled some wild animal with free movements. “There’s nothing in your head I don’t know about anyway.”
“How do you know?” Goten stood. He could feel himself; he was far different from Trunks. //How did we become so different, anyway?// He held himself rigidly, tending to relax later in the day. Then again, he was offended by what he took as in insult to his intelligence. //And I’ve had plenty of those, especially from him!//
“What do you mean?” Trunks’ innocent expression appeared to be genuine. “I just know. I’ve always known.” He shrugged. “If I had to make a conscious effort to afford you privacy now, it really would make no difference.”
“And you never shared this with me... why?” Goten clenched his teeth together, not really understanding why Trunks didn’t seem to get how he felt. He was sickeningly laid-back, as a matter of fact.
“I... I thought you knew,” he said, hands held out palm up. He continued with bafflement, “It just always seemed like you knew me beyond what words could explain. I know why I was able to anticipate you so much, in all our battles and everything over the years. I’m curious though, if you couldn’t feel my thoughts, how did you return it?”
“I have no _earthly_ idea what you mean.” Goten was baffled as well. Trunks got some water and sat down.
“Well, you can sense me.”
“Yeah...”
“Think about this; concentrate. Close your eyes.”
Goten frowned at him. “I’m not ‘mental’ like you claim to be, Trunks.”
“If I can do it, then I know you can. Just oblige me.”
Goten’s eyes snapped shut. “Fine.”
“You can sense my ki.”
“Duh.”
“So you know where I am. You know my exact position, and you know what my power level is.”
“Negligible.”
“Ouch. Anyway, you can also sense what state I’m in.”
“That’s nothing new, Trunks. It’s not special, we can all do that with each other.” He flung his hands widely at the darkness behind his lids.
“So, what am I feeling?”
“You’re... dormant. You’re... I dunno, what do you want me to say? Uh... I imagine you’re... yeah... you’re getting a little annoyed at me. But it’s not affecting you; it’s not one of the things that would raise a power level, it’s just there if you need it. It’s like...” Goten really thought about it. He waved one hand in an arc in front of him, palm facing outward. “There’s white noise in front of me.”
“Alright, I’ll concentrate.” Trunks’ drink hit the table with a soft thunk. He took a few audible breaths and his being relaxed. His ki dropped, dipping below where he would normally pay attention to it. Goten’s brow furrowed as it started to increase again.
“You feel like Vegeta.”
“Hmm?”
“Not... you feel like him, but... it’s like, you sum up his presence.”
“Why do you say that?”
“There’s a lot of energy below the surface, and there’s a solid wall that holds it back. It’s negative energy, but you’re forcing it back. It’s how people react when Vegeta starts being a royal pain... the frustration is held back to avoid a bigger incident, but it can be breached easily, or even let through to deal with him.”
“Well, I was thinking of my father. Do you see? You interpreted your own feelings, and the general feelings you sense from other people, and you can apply them to me. Only, it’s hard for you since you haven’t been doing it that long. But it’s easy to get used to. It became instinctive when I was too young to realize. And then...” Trunks’ energy reading fluctuated.
“What? What won’t you tell me?” He could sense equal parts dread and happiness at hearing his words.
“You know what, Goten? I think you were doing it the whole time. Did you even know it?”
“And then what?” Goten still didn’t open his eyes, but his hands fell onto his hips.
“I can’t explain it. It’s just feelings, and then... it’s like I knew what you really felt, the things you can’t tell from power level. I said to myself a lot, “Goten would probably say....” and then I just started hearing your voice in my head. After a while I realized that it _was_ your voice. It wasn’t me anymore.” Trunks seemed to deflate a bit at telling all this. His voice was soft.
Goten opened his eyes. “I _don’t_... want to be... _attached_ to you.” His tail lashed and fists clenched.
Trunks looked up at him, and then smiled. “I know.”
“Why are you always so sad?” Goten’s voice lacked power, and broke.
Trunks’ face fell, too-long bangs overshadowing his eyes.
Goten paused for a long moment, then turned away from him. He tugged on his clothes and boots and walked out the door past the other motionless young man. He found himself walking a path in the forest. It was becoming more and more familiar. He seemed to be ending up here at night. He didn’t think Trunks ever knew he’d stopped sleeping well. He sometimes could see the waning moon.
He could only see that empty look, though, in his mind now. How he could say something, when Trunks was smiling, and sometimes he’d lose his color, usually he just went from happy to blank, and the smile dropped from his face before he bowed his head and refused to respond, lips slightly parted as though he wanted to... but...
Goten cursed and slapped a tree branch from his face, going off into the forest.

Trunks knew that Goten wouldn’t come out of the underbrush for a while. He’d been thrown off. So had Trunks, for that matter. Goten had sounded as if it mattered to him, how the older Saiyan felt, and then he just broke and walked away.
//Why can’t you be yourself, Goten? I miss you so much.// Trunks leaned back on the grass, one hand moving over to feel if the clothes he’d just washed were drying. He closed his eyes for a moment and listened to the river, but the soft rush soon retreated from his hearing, even when he tried to hold onto it.
//What was that?// Trunks’ mind was lulled into a passive state, and he thought he sensed something.
//Who’s there?// Trunks frowned. //Goten?//
At the mental voicing of the name, there was a pause. He was connected somewhere, moving through trees and brush. He was tired, and hungry, but there was something that nagged at him, and he couldn’t return without knowing what it was.
//It is you. Goten... do you hear me? I’m not going away.// He felt himself being pushed out. There was an interesting reaction; it was like he was being repulsed, but the senses wouldn’t let him go. There was longing from somewhere.
//No, I won’t stay here. I want to, though.// He pulled his mind from Goten’s, opening his eyes. “Poor stubborn fool. You’re still my Goten, under all that screw-up.”
He reached up and touched his cheek. Ever since the morning, there was one spot on him that tingled.

Goten did show up, nearly at nightfall. He came in, kicked off his boots and sat at the table with his head in his hands. Trunks set dinner down for him and went towards his bed.
“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind you being around.”
“You mean it?”
“I said it.”
Trunks sat down across from him, watching Goten with one hand under his chin. He could tell somehow that Goten had come to some conclusion, there was something that had torn his defensiveness apart.
“What is your problem, Goten?” Trunks asked him carefully to identify.
“I’m... I don’t know how having this tail affects me.” He released his secrets unwillingly. “It seems to make a Saiyan a true Saiyan, you know? I don’t know how, but I’ve changed emotionally. And now I don’t know how to handle being a normal human or being a Saiyan... and also, it’s a question of feeling. I can be like a human and be with humans... or I can be a Saiyan, a half Saiyan anyway, and be with you. And I... just don’t know what I want anymore.” Goten didn’t look up at him, murmuring through his hands. He didn’t seem in the least enticed by dinner or sleep. His whole body from top to tail tip looked defeated.
Trunks sat in an amazed silence for a long time. “Congratulations, Goten, you’ve achieved the hardest part; you’ve identified the problem. Now I only hope you have some solution in your mind, ‘cause I don’t think I can stand the suspense.”
“Don’t condescend to me Trunks, I get so sick of it.”
Trunks frowned. “Yes, it’s in my nature to do so. But I haven’t been doing it purposely.”
“You haven’t, really... it’s just that you are so flippant.”
“Gomen.”
“Yeah, well... I don’t know what else I can say to you anymore.”
“Who ever said you had to say anything?”
“I have to protect myself. I can’t let you back in.” If Trunks hadn’t known better, he would have sworn Goten was asleep, talking to himself in dogged exhaustion. “I can’t have you near me.”
“I know I hurt you before...” Trunks’ tone indicated how badly he felt about it. “I couldn’t be near you, then. I didn’t... I didn’t want you to wake up, I didn’t want to see the look on your face. I was sure it would be sadness, or anger, and I knew it would have broken my heart. I just didn’t intend to save mine by breaking yours. You don’t know how sorry I am.”
“Yeah... I do. I’ve seen you pushing your feelings away; you’ve stayed far away from me for nearly a month, uncomfortably so.” Goten dropped his hands, but couldn’t find the energy to raise his gaze above table-top level. His face was the color of a sheet. “You’re falling over yourself to give me whatever it is I want, acting like a you’re a statue or something, and don’t feel anything. I know you know I couldn’t have dealt with it before. But I’m so tired of fighting. I don’t want everything I do to be despite you, I don’t want to have to prove myself right from some stupid argument. I can’t do it anymore.”
“Goten...”
“I also can’t think anymore. I’m going to bed.” He rose and went that direction, taking off his shirt.
“Aren’t you... at least going to eat today?”
Goten shook his head and fell across his cot.
“Oyasumi nasai, Goten-chan.”
“Oyasumi ne...”
He was out in nothing flat. Trunks moved over and stood above him.
“We’ve made good progress today, Goten-chan.” He spread the blanket over the pale dark-haired young man and curled up in his own bed, smiling a little. It faded shortly. //I just wonder if you’ll hate me later.//

Trunks opened his eyes to darkness, unsure as to why he was awake when his body insisted it needed more sleep. He turned over, seeing a dark shape close to his bed. //What’s... Goten?//
He rose up and leaned over him. “Goten. Oi, Goten.” He shook him lightly.
Goten grunted as he woke, reaching up to rub at his eyes, turning his head up toward Trunks.
“Doushita no?”
“I... uh...” Goten rubbed his face again, sounding a little nervous.
“Calm down. What is it?”
“I.... had some kind of dream. I... don’t remember what it was...”
//Is he lying?//
“But I couldn’t stay... over there. I’m sorry...”
Trunks sighed softly, then reached down and touched his friend’s face. “Anything as long as you don’t cry anymore.”
Goten’s skin grew warm quickly. “I wasn’t!”
//Lying for sure this time.// Trunks made no note of it and instead opened his arms. Goten made a sound, like he was about to break down again. He rose and climbed in beside him without being asked again. Trunks was slightly disappointed when Goten wouldn’t consent to being held, but he reasoned, //I don’t really deserve it anyway.//
Goten laid with his back turned toward him, and Trunks tossed the edge of the blanket over him.
//What am I doing here?// Goten asked himself. //What’s wrong with me? Something is truly and seriously _wrong_.//
“Goten,” Trunks whispered. “Tell me what’s going on. Please, don’t leave me in the dark anymore.”
//I don’t _know_!// “Nothing. I’ll leave if-”
“No. No use getting offended. Just go to sleep.” Trunks had stopped him with one hand holding onto his arm, but he dropped it and turned away, moving to share as much room on the small cot as he could.
Trunks couldn’t find sleep any more, even after Goten had slowly dropped from consciousness and moved unconsciously closer to him in sleep. //I’m starting to lose it, Goten.// He glanced over as Goten’s messy too-long hair flopped into his eyes with movement. //I don’t know how long I can let myself be so empty, away from you.//
After the sun began to rise, Trunks slipped quietly from the bed which Goten had slowly been taking over. He left the house and brought in apples from the tree above, one thing which Goten would usually eat. Trunks was starting to become concerned about his dietary habits; at home Goten would eat anything. If it was just the wild fare, then he would have already gotten over it. //Besides, I’ve seen him eat dinosaur. When you can eat that, you can eat anything.//
Trunks was starting to wonder if what was upsetting Goten was beginning to affect his other habits. He’d refused to spar for a couple weeks. When Trunks had unwillingly released him from his obligation, he’d noted to himself that things grew more comfortable between them for a while, but they were soon in the same leaky boat weeks offshore once again.
He tugged at one apple that was determined to stay on the tree. //Why can’t I help him? He’s so important to me.// Trunks yanked the apple down and for some reason plopped down on the roof and crammed it into his mouth.
//And why? Why should he have taken our spar sessions personally? Is he upset because he can’t defeat me? That is _not_ Goten. We both know that personal feelings don’t enter a training session.// He chewed on the apple, deep in thought. //And every time we make progress he reels himself back in. Am I missing something? Or am I so jaded that it just doesn’t occur to me how much I... I hurt him?//
Trunks pulled the apple away and examined his toothmarks, thinking once more about the spar sessions. //And why... would he become so angry in the ring and be unable to blow it off once more? You _always_ blow it off, we both know that. It’s like..... it’s like he lost the ability to distinguish when I’m his friend or enemy. He’s more inclined to treat me as an enemy, so I can’t tell. He is angry both in and out of the match... it’s like he can’t equalize his instincts anymore.//
Trunks looked off where the sun was breaking random patterns through the trees. //There is a point for us, and I asked the others, Tou-san and Goku-san and Gohan-san long ago, they feel it too. There is a point when we need to reassure ourselves when we are finishing a fight, just who again is our friend and who is the enemy. Well, no problem! I’ve been his enemy the entire time we’ve been here!// His tail’s movements agreed with his frustration.
Trunks thought about that and other things, finally feeling Goten’s restless ki signature moving below. He jumped down and stood in the doorway, holding the bag in one hand as he leaned against the doorway momentarily. Goten stretched and turned toward him and returned his gaze evenly, the sunlight hit his pale face and he seemed just washed-out, blank for a moment. //Have you lost that, Goten? Did you know? Is that why you stopped?//
“What the hell are you thinking about me?” Goten said, obviously not liking this kind of look turned on him first thing in the morning. Trunks refrained from mentioning that he should at least have the right to think some things, as Goten was waking up from _his_ bed after a very strange night-time incident.
Trunks moved into the room and washed some of the apples at the pump as Goten realized he wouldn’t get an answer, and therefore he dressed and began to do some of his chores. Trunks decided to try and let his dark thoughts fade for a while. After all, why ruin a new day with such.
“Hey Goten, do you think-” Trunks broke off as he turned, and saw Goten standing holding a broom. He wasn’t sweeping, though, he was hanging off the broom handle, his chalk-colored face tight with eyes shut and teeth gritted, and he huffed silently in place.
“Goten!” Trunks dropped his bag and took a giant step across the room as Goten started to sink to his knees. He lowered the other young Saiyan down, and Goten’s hands and tail wrapped around his wrist in something like supplication.
“I’m sorry Trunks... I don’t know what’s going on...” Goten released him with one hand, reaching up to hold his head. His tail wrapped so tightly Trunks thought it would cut off circulation in his hand. “Demo... I don’t feel so well for a while now...”
“You _idiot_! Why didn’t you _say_ anything?” Trunks gathered him there into his arms and said, “I’m taking you home, right now.”
“Just give me a minute, and I’ll be-” Goten’s form tightened, dark eyes shooting wide open, before he crumpled lifelessly. Trunks cursed, chanting curses as his mantra as he took Goten up and shoved the front door open with his shoulder, taking a few running steps and leaping upward.
//Forget that, you’re going to a hospital first. Good God, Goten, you don’t even trust me enough to tell me what’s wrong? That either means...// Trunks considered, placing his panic aside for a moment and contemplating Goten’s ashy face. //That you really trust me with your life, or you really don’t, I guess.//

Chichi and Bulma both went for the doorway, squeezing in in an effort to see their sons.
“My poor Goten!” Chichi rushed to the side of the bed and clutched his hand. “Trunks, I thought you would take care of him!”
Bulma tsked lightly from her place beside her son. “Goten can take care of himself, Chichi-san, Trunks has never been his babysitter. Whether he chooses to take care of himself or not is up to him.” She turned back to Trunks. “You need a haircut so bad, you look like Mirai Trunks. Goten too.”
“I wouldn’t trust him with scissors.” //Yeah, he’d go for my throat.//
“What’s wrong, Trunks? I wouldn’t go for your throat.” He put the right inflection on the words as he opened his eyes that let the mothers in on their conversation.
Trunks didn’t choose to answer, only staring at him across the room. Goten returned his gaze, ignoring his mother who was getting rather flustered over him. Trunks looked down. //Why the hell do you keep giving me that expression?//
Bulma looked around the room, as the fathers dared slowly to follow the mothers inside. An idea suddenly hit her as she watched Goku, standing with an embarrassed expression (for Chichi), gently wringing his tail with both hands.
“I have an idea,” she announced. “But I need some help to get it done. Goku?”
“Yeah...?” He answered, trusting her only slightly more than Chichi.
“I think we’ll have to have a two-part plan; I’ll distract the nurses and you use the instant teleport technique.” She saw Goku brighten slightly as he realized it was _that_ kind of plan.

Bulma compared the information in the files. Vegeta happened to wander over toward her briefly, glancing over her shoulder, having no idea what she was doing, and going off since he really was needed and didn’t understand what was going on anymore.
“Okay, look here guys.” Chichi and Goku moved close to where she was sitting on the empty bed in Goten’s room, papers spread around her.
She pointed to one picture. “This is a normal human blood cell. This is Chichi’s, as a matter of fact, from her record. This one here is One particularly interesting Saiyan blood particle from Goku’s file. See how different?” Trunks edged in on the fringe of the scene to get into the conversation too, and Bulma also addressed her comments to him.
“Everything that Chichi is allergic to is listed in her file as well. And as you know, allergies that are chemical are often passed down to offspring.” She could tell Goku wasn’t really following this yet, but she knew Trunks was and Chichi was obviously trying. “Now, compare this Saiyan blood particle to one allergy listed in Chichi’s family.”
Bulma pointed to another picture. Trunks’ eyes widened in comprehension, and Chichi blinked. Goku looked from picture to picture. “Those two pictures look almost exactly the same,” he exclaimed.
“Right!” Bulma said triumphantly.
“.....So.....?” Goku asked.
“This gene is in your bloodstream, Goku, but it’s usually dormant. In Goten’s file, it’s also there, but as far as I can tell, it’s never a gene that his body has utilized.” She glanced over to where Goten was sound asleep. “But since it’s so similar to this allergen, I bet whatever genes Goten has from Chichi-san are mistaking it for a foreign invader.”
“.....So.....?” Goku asked.
“I see it,” Trunks said. “Goten’s human half is allergic to his Saiyan half.”
“Or rather, a gene that has recently been activated, like when you all grew your tails back.”
“Then Gohan is at risk too for whatever’s doing this to Goten.” Goku determined.
“Everyone in your family is, Goku-san, and maybe even in mine too,” Trunks pointed out, “Except for the adults. Every one of you in the last generation is either a Saiyan or a human. It’s just your kids who are screwed,” he joked.
“I wonder what it was that activated that gene, what made our tails come back.” Goku looked at his tail as if it were a long-lost friend. Chichi got a dreading look.
“Well, that’s over,” Bulma dismissed. “It could be anything.”
“Well,” Chichi said. “No one with human blood seemed to contract that virus you all had earlier....”
“And here I thought Goten and I were just acting strange from the tails.” Trunks shook his head.
“You’re right, Trunks, that there may be allergens in my blood that would put you and your sister at risk. So, we just have to get rid of the stimulus for the gene, and it will go dormant again, don’t you agree?”
All those present (who understood) agreed. “So, what?” Goku asked. “We cut the kids’ tails off?”
“Well, whaddaya mean we? I wouldn’t do it,” Bulma said, frowning at his choice of words. “We could go ahead and have them surgically removed. We’re in a hospital anyway.”
“I’ll do it,” Trunks said. “Goten’s gotta get his cut off anyway, right?” At Chichi’s nod, he continued. “So I’ll just go first. It doesn’t feel too cool being the only one without a tail.”
“Alright....” Bulma said slowly. “I’ll call Bra, and Gohan to bring himself and Pan.”
Trunks nodded in return and sat down to wait for things to be arranged.

“Are you sure you have to take him again?”
Chichi sounded fretful as she brushed her son’s bangs from his sleeping face.
“If you’ll forgive me, Chichi-san, Goten and I have some things we need to work out.” And that’s all Trunks would say about it. He looked down at where Goten lay on his stomach, face to the side. //I owe it to one of us. Now, which one would that be?//
So here he was now, with Goten, back at the little cabin in the middle of nowhere, after effusively promising both mothers to come home soon. Of course, he left before they could get around to determining when ‘soon’ was. //They had said the end of summer, so that’s what I get. Unfortunately, that’s not so far away, and at this rate...//
Trunks poked at the fire, and flexed the muscles in his back unconsciously. “Idiot,” he told himself. If he hadn’t kept doing it.... “It hurts when you do that, don’t do that.” It just felt like something was missing. That’s all. //Just...//
“Gone. It’s gone. What happened?” Trunks responded to Goten’s groggy voice and turned to see him. He shifted slightly, and Trunks rose from the fireside and went to sit on his cot.
“Daijoubu desu ka?” Trunks leaned over him, noting that his skin was still pale, but not like before.
“Why is my tail gone?”
“You were sick,” Trunks told him simply. “It had to go. Your whole family. Except, I think your parents are still arguing about Goku’s tail.” Trunks grinned at the thought of Chichi shouting up a tree at Goku who for some reason really wanted his tail.
“What about you? Of course, perfect Trunks,” Goten said, sounding somewhat surly. “You get to keep yours.”
“I got mine off.”
“What? Why would you do a thing like that?” Goten seemed genuinely puzzled. “I would want to keep mine.”
“Are you sure? It doesn’t look like much when it’s not on your body...”
“Eww!” Goten shuddered and then calmed again. “Why?”
“Well, we don’t know about my family yet. If we’ll get sick if we keep our tails. So, I just said, get it off. Besides, I can’t just keep my tail and you don’t. That wouldn’t be fair, then I’d _always_ win the spar sessions, and you deserve at least a chance to defeat the Great Trunks.” He grinned and pushed his bangs back.
Goten looked up at him with an almost morbid fascination. “And you do fully realize.... that I hate you?”
“You don’t know the meaning of the word.” Trunks said this with a finality that brought Goten a smile.
“Trying to give me orders again,” he groused. “I feel different now.”
“You should, chemically. Does it hurt anymore, where they cut it off?”
“No, not really, but I...” Goten’s eyes took a glassy look. “I do want to talk to you. There is a lot that’s on my mind.”
“Uh-huh. I know what you mean. It’s okay, I think you should get some more rest. I’ll be around when you wake up.”
“Promise?”
“You know it.”
Goten nodded and allowed his eyes to close. Trunks moved away from his bedside. //I’m glad you’re willing to speak to me, Goten-chan. Maybe.....// Trunks leaned his head against the edge of Goten’s cot and closed his eyes momentarily. //Maybe.......//

Trunks’ eyes fluttered open, and he just realized the near complete dark in the small cabin. He turned his head slowly, catching a glimpse of the glowing embers that were left from the fire. It was starting to become cold out in the evenings, cold at night, and every time he stepped outside he could almost hear Old Man Winter sucking the marrow from Summer’s bones. He wondered briefly if he should restart the fire. He went over and fed it, fanning the glow that decided to move up the fuel in a slovenly manner. That was alright, though, they didn’t need it hot.
Trunks sat with his feet under him, looking into the bottoms of the flames that slowly grew a hot blue. He reached up unconsciously and brushed his hair back behind his ear. //My hair always did grow fast.// He pulled a hair piece he’d stolen from his sister at the hospital off of his wrist and around his fistful of hair. //I guess I do look like Mirai Trunks. Almost, anyway.// He turned his head and watched the top of Goten’s motionless head for a second.
He turned back to the flames in thought. //Mirai Trunks never had a Goten. I wonder how he got by?//
He rose and moved slowly across the room and settled his head on his folded arms on the edge of Goten’s cot, near where his head had been laying before when he’d slept. //I guess I’m privileged. Yeah, that’s it.// Trunks’ thoughts took a decided turn toward irony as he remembered some of Goten’s more outrageous antics throughout childhood and young adulthood. Then Goten turned slightly in his sleep and Trunks’ heart just melted.
//That’s not fair. He doesn’t even do it on purpose. Do I ever make him feel the way he makes me feel? Do we match other in passion as in everything else?// He brushed his fingertips idly against a long strand of raven hair. //As we grew we weren’t a matched pair anymore. I wonder if we’re being given an opportunity to avoid losing each other, or if it’s something inevitable. No, Goten, I won’t lose you!// Trunks’ hand clenched in a fist as he swore it to himself. //No matter what it takes. Unless....// A sad thought struck. //What if that’s what he decides he wants? I mean, odd things have happened... things happened between us... what if he decides he wants to forget? Could I possibly let that happen to us? Would I if that’s what he wished, or would I be so selfish as to try to keep him with me no matter what he chooses?//
For some reason it was the one thing he wanted to do in the universe right now, though he knew it was probably wrong, but he did it anyway. Trunks gathered his legs beneath him and pushed himself up, leaning over Goten.
//Your hair is so long. How does it change? Mine never wants to change.// He pushed the thought from his mind and pressed his lips to Goten’s softly, just brushing his. He tried to hold onto the sensation of warmth against his mouth. //You’re always so warm. It’s one thing that’s so fascinating... I never thought I would take such pleasure from being near one so warm.//
Trunks drew back, maybe an inch from the round face he’d spent so much time contemplating. He was almost shocked when Goten’s eyes opened, with no indication of having just woken up. He blinked his dark eyes at Trunks, then reached up with one hand and rubbed at them.
“I’ve been awake longer than you,” he admitted without being asked.
“Thinking?” Trunks propped his chin on one hand and tried not to act guilty.
“About you. About everything. It’s been a long time since this all started.”
“Not really,” Trunks countered.
“It feels long. And I feel like I’ve done a lot of stupid things along the way.”
“Nothing can’t be fixed.”
“Some things can’t,” Goten now countered.
“Like what? What do you feel that you’ve done so wrong?” Trunks couldn’t completely keep all of the anxiety from his voice as he spoke, though he kept his expression neutral.
“I feel...” Goten seemed almost reluctant to share his emotions. He pulled his blanket to his chin, which struck Trunks as a sign of insecurity.
“I want to know what you’re thinking,” Trunks said softly. “Please go on.”
“I feel as if I shouldn’t have let anything happen between us.” Goten seemed all at once guilty and sad.
“If I recall, I was pressing the moment.” He was at least successful at keeping the hurt from his voice.
“Please, don’t take that comment wrong,” Goten said quickly. “It was in reference to me. I don’t feel as if I should have let anything happen.... I... just had a feeling that I would get hurt later.”
“Goten, I’ve apologized several times. I know that doesn’t make up for anything, but I would hope that you could at least tell that I regret what I did...” Goten shook his head and Trunks trailed off in uncertainty.
“It’s still not about you Trunks.... “ Goten took a deep breath and whispered, “You’re wonderful. But I don’t feel that you understand how _ I _ feel. I wanted to be with you.” He seemed to drag the words from inside himself painfully. “But I was too deep, and I don’t think you were. I knew that I would be hurt.”
Trunks took a breath as the air seemed too close. //He was ready... he had some kind of feelings, and he knew... he knew that I hadn’t been prepared for any kind of deep feelings between us.// Goten turned and watched him as he thought, and Trunks wondered what he was picking up on. //I realize my mistake though. I don’t.....//
“What are you thinking right now?”
“I don’t.... “ Trunks rose to his feet and turned away. He heard Goten sit up in the bed. “I _don’t_ want to be without you, Goten!”
There was silence from behind him. //Is he in shock?// But he could pick up nothing. He forced himself to continue.
“It seemed to me like... I had things in me that were awakened, and I needed to be with you.. I just didn’t realize how much. I wanted, when I woke up, to stay near you, but I just couldn’t think, and the way it happened.... I never wanted to see the betrayed look that I imagined on your face. So I ran. And when Chichi asked me to talk to you, I knew somewhere in me that it had been the wrong thing to do, at least when it came to your sake.”
Trunks suddenly wanted to see his face badly, but couldn’t bring himself to turn for fear he couldn’t continue. “But I brought you here, and I had the best of all intentions. I figured, ‘Sure, living alone in such close quarters with me will show him. He doesn’t want to be with me.’ But the longer we were here, the more hostile you got to me, and the more I wanted to break down that barrier between us. I didn’t want to show you anymore... I wanted you to want to be with me. And I also realized that in letting my subconscious guide me in my course of action, it was steering me straight at you, and by that time, I didn’t want to be anywhere else, with anyone else.”
There was still silence. //Say something, damn you, let me know if you care about what I’m saying!//
“I was an idiot. Now I know that I want to be with you more than anything, and you wanted to be with me, and it should have worked. At least, you did....” Trunks shook his head. “I don’t know what to do anymore. I need you...” he admitted at long last, sure that his utter humiliation would prevent even the deepest feelings in his heart from drawing themselves out. //I’m a fool, I’m in love with someone I’ve caused now to hate me.//
Trunks felt a sudden pressure around him, and he glanced down to see Goten’s arms moving around his waist. He rested his head against Trunks’ back for a long moment as if gathering himself. “I love you,” Goten’s soft voice came, higher as if strained, and Trunks could feel him gulp.
//Just three words, and you make me yours. Maybe I hate you too...// Trunks turned, pulling Goten’s grip loose long enough to do so, and when Goten’s arms tightened around him again he couldn’t bring himself to pull away.
“Look at me and say that,” he asked softly.
Goten turned his face upward, and Trunks’ hand moved under his chin, feeling some of those fresh tears run onto his own hands. Goten smiled sadly and told him, “You always affect me...” He swallowed again. “Wo ai ni.”
He whispered Goten’s name and kissed him, feeling Goten respond slowly, almost as though he didn’t dare that it was real. //After all the confusion...//
//It was worth it.// Trunks wasn’t sure where the thought came from until he felt Goten melt against him. //Wakarimashita.// And he got the feeling that Goten heard and laid it to rest.
As his lips parted from Goten’s, the slightly smaller boy made a request; “Kiss me like you did before.”
“I’m too mixed up.”
“Then just kiss me and let me know you mean it.”
Trunks lowered his mouth and kissed Goten, coaxing his mouth open as it grew more passionate, and Goten’s tongue joined his and resisted his invasion, pressing himself against Trunks and wrapping arms around his neck. Trunks found his arms winding around Goten’s waist and he pressed his mouth deeper into his. Goten’s mouth fought against his, both seeming determined to be dominant, until their mouths parted and tongues fought in the open, and Trunks paused as though just realizing that Goten only asked for a kiss. But Goten looked into his eyes. They were nearly the same height, he realized as Goten leaned his head forward and tasted the purple-haired one’s lips softly.
//I want you too, Goten...// He moved Goten back as his mouth seized on the other’s again, and both moaned softly as it absorbed them. Trunks backed up slowly and brought Goten down onto the bed. They both seemed to pause, and Trunks looked down into too-dark eyes, where the pupil barely seemed to exist.
//Your eyes are like flame,// Goten thought, mind seizing on the most useless fact... so he drew Trunks to him again and banished it from his mind. Trunks’ hand quickly became familiar with him all over again, leaving Goten shivering as they moved against suddenly bare skin on his shoulders.
//Have you wanted me so badly for so long?// Goten’s brow furrowed, and he reached up and pulled Trunk’s clothes off before the older demi-Saiyan thought to change the arrangement. Goten flipped him onto his back, wanting to touch him the same way he’d been touched before, wanting Trunks to know how that felt.
//Maybe this time we’ll be smart enough to know that our feelings are right.// Goten felt Trunks grip him, hands sliding down his upper arms as Goten examined and teased and touched his body. His mouth moved in random patterns across Trunks’ skin, feeling the other demi-Saiyan slowly give up his fight as he was unable to bring himself to take control again.
//Do you like it that I need to touch you so badly?// Goten’s mouth found a pulse point on his neck and let his kisses linger there for a long moment, feeling Trunks’ heartbeat flutter and speed up as he moved himself against his skin. He did the same with his wrists, then pressed them to the bed above their heads. Trunks’ eyes opened, not quite sure what to make of everything. His eyes were only half-seeing, clouded with lust and a deep need.
Goten’s mouth moved slowly over his chest, teeth catching briefly at a nipple, moving his tongue down Trunks’ ribs, still able to feel his heart beating.
//Fine, then. I’ll make it so that you never leave me again.// His thoughts took a turn for the possessive, and he thought he felt Trunks’ reaction to them. He could almost sense the complete and total surrender. //Good.//
Unable to stand the friction, Goten tossed the rest of his clothing away and Trunks’ eyes widened in something near urgency at the incredible tactile sensation of Goten’s erection against him.
Trunks groaned his name, and Goten smirked slightly to himself. He then frowned in uncertainty, however, and wondered as he moved between Trunks’ soft thighs if he knew how to do this without hurting the other young man. Right now, though, it didn’t seem as if Trunks cared about pleasure verses pain, his hips thrusting upward, trying to force Goten to finish it and give him what he needed.
//So damn greedy. That’s okay. I need you that much too.// Goten bit his lip and moved one finger into Trunks, watching as his on-again, off-again lover flinched momentarily in surprise, then relaxed slowly to allow Goten’s intimate touch. His body was tense, and his lips were pressed together as Goten searched for the spot that would cause the incredible sensations in him that he had caused in Goten their first time together.
At one seemingly unspecific moment, Trunks gasped and his eyes snapped open. “Goten!”
Goten let out a small breath and brushed slowly against the spot that brought Trunks’ breath up short. He was nearly whimpering when Goten repeated the action again. “Please... G-Goten...”
“Shh...” Goten knew his voice would be shaky too, and he moved slowly to press himself against his lover. Trunks made a small noise, a whisper of sound, that Goten couldn’t decipher. Trunks’ hands found his waist and pulled Goten tightly against him, forcing his lover inside of him quickly, and it was Goten’s turn to gasp. “Trunks...” Something in Goten made him draw back and thrust himself in again before he willed it. Trunks let out a ragged breath, still becoming used to him, and gripped him for a moment so hard that Goten could feel bruises forming. He felt his body scream out at him to take Trunks fully right now, and he moved to do so with abandon, feeling Trunks respond, hips pushing back against his just as hard. Goten shuddered at the feel of Trunks’ tightness and drew back to thrust himself into that sensation. The pleasure was almost sinful.
“Goten, please, more...” Trunks whispered words nearly began where another left off to become one desperate plea, and Goten silenced him with his mouth as one hand moved between them, stroking his lover’s hardness slowly, feeling Trunks willingly press into his hand and urge him forward.
//I had no idea how I needed you...// Goten’s thoughts of devotion were overridden by his body’s need, the craving to make his former best friend more, a part of him. His hand grew more insistent as his thrusts became harder, less focused, and Trunks lost control as well. It seemed like a lifetime of pleasure before Trunks’ muscles tightened around him, and his hand tightened involuntarily, both of them giving the last needed sensations to the other to bring them over the edge.
Goten’s body remained tense as a string for several long moments, shuddering in release as he felt wet warmth cover them both and Trunks collapse beneath him. Goten was simply unable to hold himself up and was relieved when Trunks pulled him close.
“Are we....” Goten paused for a long moment to force oxygen into his brain. “Are we going to regret that tomorrow?” He asked softly. //In other words, will you?//
“Not this time,” Trunks informed him, not even bothering to try and break the sudden shyness between them with a smile. “I’m not stupid enough to leave you twice.”
“I wouldn’t let you, this time. I would do whatever it took to keep you close to me.” Goten’s hands gripped Trunks’ waist, feeling similar shuddering breaths flow through them. “I’m just greedy enough to do it.”
Trunks looked as if he might not respond to that, and Goten said, “I suppose that I was denying all this time how much I needed you. I was right about one thing though, that something was missing from me, and it was you.”
“The turnaround is scaring me,” Trunks quipped in an exhausted and amused drawl.
“Get used to fear.”
“Can do,” he whispered, and pulled Goten close.
Goten’s eyes fought the urge to blink, much less let him sleep. He needed rest, but what if he woke up and this had all been a dream? What if he woke and still hated Trunks? Or worse, what if he woke again and his lover was absent? Goten knew he couldn’t stand that a second time, no matter what.
“Suki yo, Goten-chan...” Trunks mumbled in his ear. He was falling asleep now, and Goten felt weeks’ worth of anger and pain combining to drag him into rest, so that he could sleep off the hurtful feelings of before that still seemed present in the air.
//You didn’t lie to me about that, did you.// Goten confirmed Trunks’ words from before. //I’m a fool. A fool without options. I just love you too much.// With that, Goten wrapped arms around Trunks, who gave him a soft smile before dropping off.
//I surrender.//

“You were right about one thing, Trunks-kun.”
“And what was that? Setting aside for the moment, of course, that I was right about far more than one thing.”
Goten lifted an eyebrow at Trunks, who didn’t really see it, since his head was on Goten’s stomach.
“It’s the end of the summer,” he noted, picking up a leaf that had just fallen nearby, “and I’ve made my decision.”
Trunks’ clear blue eyes stared upward toward the sky, with a small smile and an expression of something like wonder. “You’re something else again, Goten. Tonikaku, what have you decided?”
“What, don’t you know? I can’t go on without you after this.”
“How do you think our families will feel?” Trunks asked lightly.
“Who cares?” Goten said flippantly, and was forced by his lover’s silence to reconsider. “I think they’ll be happy for us. And if they’re not, they can just find something else to screw with.”
“Goten! You’re the most awful person.. you’d better be glad your mother’s not here!” Trunks teased. “Well, the only person who I can really see saying anything would be Tou-san. And since he doesn’t seem to like me enough to interfere in my decisions, then there’s no problem.”
“Sure he likes you. He’s just Vegeta-san, that’s all.”
“Like that explains it.”
“I’m just glad we’re more worried about your father than each other. If it comes down to you, I could kick anyone’s ass any day, but I don’t know how well I’d do against you.”
“That’s it!”
“Nani?”
“That’s what I’ve been forgetting, Goten-chan!” Trunks sat up and Goten rolled over onto his side to aim a quizzical look at him. “I am determined that you will beat me in a fair fight. And you went and distracted me.”
“Yeah, well...” Goten complained. “You liked it.”
“Get up!” Trunks tugged at Goten’s sleeve. “And if you don’t win against me, I’ll... I’ll... I’ll find Paris and kiss her!”
“What?! Chotto nani yo, I won’t stand for that!” Goten leaped to his feet to face Trunks. “That’s it then, I’m going to put you down!” He made a gesture towards the ground.
“I hope Paris-san is brushing her teeth right now.”
“I’m going to put you down, and then I’m going to kiss you, and you’re going to forget all thoughts of her!” Goten swore and took a defensive position.
“I hope so!” Trunks swore right back and grinned, leaving Goten slightly off-balance as he attacked.
Goten quickly put an arm up and blocked Trunks’ attack, then swung a fist toward him. Trunks knocked it out of the way as well and the two fell into a barrage of fist-missiles that left the very air charged with ki. Trunks went Super Saiyan and aimed a blast at Goten. Goten phased out around it and punched his lover in the stomach. Trunks barely felt it, so Goten raised his power level until his coloring matched that of the other young man.
Goten rushed him, and Trunks phased out and in right behind him again. Unfortunately, while he was phasing he didn’t see Goten phase out then in, facing the other direction, so Trunks ran right into his arms. Goten looked as if he might hug his lover, but Trunks felt the crackle of energy against his skin and leapt backward.
Up above the trees Goten phased in and scattered the area with energy blasts, aimed at Trunks from a head-on position every time, both of them phasing in and out, until Trunks gave that up and leaped backward several times, and up, until he was on Goten’s level of height. All of a sudden, a slew of blasts were aimed at him, and Trunks phased out and in just out of the range of explosions. but when he did, he was once again in Goten’s arms, and Goten grabbed him just before they dropped like a flying brick.
When Trunks landed, he felt Goten slam down onto him and stars exploded in his vision. When he finished calling them all by name and blinked them away, Goten was sitting straddling him, with Trunks’ arms pinned to the ground by his side.
Goten’s mouth was quick to claim his, quickly pressing his advantage and forcing Trunks’ mouth open to fully taste him yet again. Trunks waited through it, tense, and finally Goten’s mouth parted from his. Trunks sprung his line.
“Well, okay, you’re pretty good, but I still think Paris might be better...”
Goten growled menacingly at him. “Trunks, trust me, that woman does not know how to kiss.” Goten leaned down and demonstrated the proper technique to his lover once again.
“And how do you know this?” Trunks asked a little breathlessly, and accusatorial when their lips parted again.
“I tried! I don’t think she even knows what it is! She’s sooo naive!!” Goten groaned.
“Uh-huh. Mister Big Man trying to get his way with some clueless girl. When will you learn?”
“I’ll make you pay for that!”
“Oh yeah?”
“Hai!” Goten proclaimed, and his mouth took Trunks’ again.
“Well, I suppose you’re better than Paris,” Trunks said diffidently. “Not any prettier though.”
“If I can defeat you, I can kill you, you know.”
“Who said I was defeated?”
“Come on then!”
“I lied, I’m defeated.”
“Really?”
“No, I’m just comfortable.”
“Comfortable, or turned on?”
Trunks was silent for a long moment. “Comfortable.”
Goten choked and fell off at his side.
“But that’s okay, I can make you comfortable too, Goten-kun,” Trunks said affectionately and went down on him.
~*~*~*~*END